investing energy into a person doesn’t make them like you.

One of the first tasks in a recent advanced sales training I attended was determining who would benefit the most from working with the company and who would be most willing to invest in the service.

Following that, they emphasized how important it was for us brand new sales reps to approach those potential customers first because devoting our efforts to the wrong prospects would only lower our confidence and cause us to doubt the worth of the service we were selling, which was undeniably valuable. 

After training, I considered some of the failures in my own business and relationships that had damaged my self-esteem and sense of value. Most of them were due to unwise investments I made in people who simply couldn’t find value in what I had to offer. 

When we meet people in this situation, whether in business or in a relationship, we might believe that the harder we try to prove ourselves, the closer they’ll come to valuing us, but in actuality, our dedication has a greater impact on how invested we become in the relationship. Psychologically, we tend to see the things we don’t have to work hard for as unimportant. 

When our sincere efforts are met with indifference, it can have a significant negative impact on how we feel about ourselves, but it isn't always our fault. Possibly, we're communicating our value to the wrong type of people. 

By directing our energy toward the right people, we can increase the likelihood of success and prevent unnecessary damage to our self-image. We become attached to the people we invest in, so it's critical to ensure that our efforts are being aimed towards the ones who will appreciate and value us.